Eventually everyone stopped laughing at me long enough to eat their food and the money waiter came over and gave us a bill. Who ever would have thought that a few burgers and a club sandwich would have cost that much in a pub… it is possible, however, that we drank more than a pitcher or two at that seating!
The five of us (Jamie had somehow decided that we were not too rude to hang with after dinner for a while) went into the bar. If you have never been to The Lower Deck, let me briefly describe it for you. It is dark, it has a low ceiling and it is cramped and full of picnic tables… that’s it. I sometimes wonder, during moments of sobriety, why it is that I love that place so much… it must be the good service or the live music… Anyway, we went in and ordered, and no, it was not a couple of pitchers! At The Lower Deck the beer waiters cruise around all night with trays of draft that you can just take and pay for… that is correct, NO LINE UPS! Ahhh yes, that is why I love that place. The beer waiter really got used to seeing us that night.
As we were all sitting at an indoor picnic table, Todd notices a girl sitting on front of us, (well, bent might be a better term) with the top 3 inches of her thong exposed. He pointed and smiled… I pointed (with the camera) and snapped. As I mentioned in an earlier post, Halifax is a great city for asses:) After this completely juvenile stunt, Jamie says, “Let’s go outside and see Signal Hill play.” There were two things wrong with this statement: first we didn’t see anywhere to see a band outside so we all figured Jamie was trying to get us out of there before someone recognized him; secondly, Signal Hill was from Newfoundland, and we didn’t do all this travelling and put 4 guys in one hotel room just to see a pub band from home!
Well, apparently there was a second outdoor venue on the other side of the bar, one which only the locals knew about it seems. When we got there we could have given Jamie a collective kiss or hug maybe, or more likely a ‘good job’ slap on the back… we didn’t, but we were happy…. we bought him a beer instead. Here was a big portable stage in a courtyard full of party animals and fraternity brothers and sisters… we fit right in!
As if 4 guys from Newfoundland rocking out to a Newfoundland band playing KISS cover tunes wasn’t enough, in struts a Staggette party… all wearing matching tight, white t-shirts. This didn’t really become all that important until later when it started to rain…the irony of me being an ass man was not lost on me at this point. The 4 Guys are not particularly known for their shyness, so within about 20 minutes we knew the entire party and convinced them to stop bar hopping and spend the rest of the night at The Lower Deck with us… they did. At some point in time, markers got broken out and everyone was signing everyone else’s t-shirt. Carol (mother of the bride and watchful guardian of frat boys) kept a close eye on all the men lined up to sign the shirts. I have to say, for a lady in her 50’s, Carol was in fine form, and friendly. I asked her how long she had been divorced, she replied, “What makes you think I am divorced?” I told her, “No one of your vintage is in that kind of shape unless they are looking for a new man.” She smiled and slapped my butt. Either I was right or she was a very big tease.
Eventually, for the first time that night, the beer waiter was no where to be found. Matt and I decided to head inside and hit the bar while checking out the other band. Getting a spot to hang at the actual bar proved surprisingly easy, I guess most people figure, ‘why go to a bar when the bar comes to you so regularly?’ Seems that we were impatient.
So, I slide up to the bar, next to this lady with a huge belly laugh, a great sense of humour and a friendly smile. Sexually appealing she was not, but she was nice. She started chatting with me in a overly friendly type of way, if you know what I mean… I had thoughts going through my head of, “How do I get out of here without being rude?” I smiled and turned away to order a beer… that is when I felt this hand grab my ass. I clenched up my butt checks, stood up straight and turned around… she was looking the other way and everyone else around me was a man. For a second I really thought I was imagining things. I turned around again… the same thing happened and she was still turned the other way. I asked Matt if he saw that, he looked at me and said, “What are you talking about?”
I said, “Someone grabbed my ass man, did you see it?”
“Ah, noooooo, just get the beer.”
So I turned around again, and again a hand grabbed my ass. This time when I turned around she was looking at me with a big smile on her face. All I could think was, “Oh God, what have I done to deserve getting cornered by this woman and why is Matt walking away to leave me here?” So, I asked her, with every bit of playful charm (in a stupid boy way, not a flirty way) I could manage to come up with, “Did you do that?”
I don’t think she heard me because she said, “Kevin, I want to introduce you to my friend Lisa.” Well… Lisa looked like she was beautiful, however, I was suffering from impaired judgement from hanging out in the sun all day and consuming continual quantaties of beer and didn’t trust the situation I seemed to be getting into. You know how people always look different the next time after you have met them in a bar... well, I was so sure that this would be one of those times. She never made it easy for me to behave though. After we chatted for a while and she knew I was from out of town and just here for the weekend and she told me that she had recently broken up with her boyfriend of two years, she put her hand on my shoulder and kissed me on the cheek. It was at that instant that I saw Matt rolling his eyes and pointing to the beer I was still holding in my hand... it seems that this pretty little thing had distracted me from my intended purpose of being at the bar in the first place.
The five of us (Jamie had somehow decided that we were not too rude to hang with after dinner for a while) went into the bar. If you have never been to The Lower Deck, let me briefly describe it for you. It is dark, it has a low ceiling and it is cramped and full of picnic tables… that’s it. I sometimes wonder, during moments of sobriety, why it is that I love that place so much… it must be the good service or the live music… Anyway, we went in and ordered, and no, it was not a couple of pitchers! At The Lower Deck the beer waiters cruise around all night with trays of draft that you can just take and pay for… that is correct, NO LINE UPS! Ahhh yes, that is why I love that place. The beer waiter really got used to seeing us that night.
As we were all sitting at an indoor picnic table, Todd notices a girl sitting on front of us, (well, bent might be a better term) with the top 3 inches of her thong exposed. He pointed and smiled… I pointed (with the camera) and snapped. As I mentioned in an earlier post, Halifax is a great city for asses:) After this completely juvenile stunt, Jamie says, “Let’s go outside and see Signal Hill play.” There were two things wrong with this statement: first we didn’t see anywhere to see a band outside so we all figured Jamie was trying to get us out of there before someone recognized him; secondly, Signal Hill was from Newfoundland, and we didn’t do all this travelling and put 4 guys in one hotel room just to see a pub band from home!
Well, apparently there was a second outdoor venue on the other side of the bar, one which only the locals knew about it seems. When we got there we could have given Jamie a collective kiss or hug maybe, or more likely a ‘good job’ slap on the back… we didn’t, but we were happy…. we bought him a beer instead. Here was a big portable stage in a courtyard full of party animals and fraternity brothers and sisters… we fit right in!
As if 4 guys from Newfoundland rocking out to a Newfoundland band playing KISS cover tunes wasn’t enough, in struts a Staggette party… all wearing matching tight, white t-shirts. This didn’t really become all that important until later when it started to rain…the irony of me being an ass man was not lost on me at this point. The 4 Guys are not particularly known for their shyness, so within about 20 minutes we knew the entire party and convinced them to stop bar hopping and spend the rest of the night at The Lower Deck with us… they did. At some point in time, markers got broken out and everyone was signing everyone else’s t-shirt. Carol (mother of the bride and watchful guardian of frat boys) kept a close eye on all the men lined up to sign the shirts. I have to say, for a lady in her 50’s, Carol was in fine form, and friendly. I asked her how long she had been divorced, she replied, “What makes you think I am divorced?” I told her, “No one of your vintage is in that kind of shape unless they are looking for a new man.” She smiled and slapped my butt. Either I was right or she was a very big tease.
Eventually, for the first time that night, the beer waiter was no where to be found. Matt and I decided to head inside and hit the bar while checking out the other band. Getting a spot to hang at the actual bar proved surprisingly easy, I guess most people figure, ‘why go to a bar when the bar comes to you so regularly?’ Seems that we were impatient.
So, I slide up to the bar, next to this lady with a huge belly laugh, a great sense of humour and a friendly smile. Sexually appealing she was not, but she was nice. She started chatting with me in a overly friendly type of way, if you know what I mean… I had thoughts going through my head of, “How do I get out of here without being rude?” I smiled and turned away to order a beer… that is when I felt this hand grab my ass. I clenched up my butt checks, stood up straight and turned around… she was looking the other way and everyone else around me was a man. For a second I really thought I was imagining things. I turned around again… the same thing happened and she was still turned the other way. I asked Matt if he saw that, he looked at me and said, “What are you talking about?”
I said, “Someone grabbed my ass man, did you see it?”
“Ah, noooooo, just get the beer.”
So I turned around again, and again a hand grabbed my ass. This time when I turned around she was looking at me with a big smile on her face. All I could think was, “Oh God, what have I done to deserve getting cornered by this woman and why is Matt walking away to leave me here?” So, I asked her, with every bit of playful charm (in a stupid boy way, not a flirty way) I could manage to come up with, “Did you do that?”
I don’t think she heard me because she said, “Kevin, I want to introduce you to my friend Lisa.” Well… Lisa looked like she was beautiful, however, I was suffering from impaired judgement from hanging out in the sun all day and consuming continual quantaties of beer and didn’t trust the situation I seemed to be getting into. You know how people always look different the next time after you have met them in a bar... well, I was so sure that this would be one of those times. She never made it easy for me to behave though. After we chatted for a while and she knew I was from out of town and just here for the weekend and she told me that she had recently broken up with her boyfriend of two years, she put her hand on my shoulder and kissed me on the cheek. It was at that instant that I saw Matt rolling his eyes and pointing to the beer I was still holding in my hand... it seems that this pretty little thing had distracted me from my intended purpose of being at the bar in the first place.
Lisa was not at all sober, and I had bought her a beer, seeing how she was being so nice. I decided that she didn't really need it and I was going to get myself out of this situation and head back to the outside band. Taking the beer out of her hand and kissing her on the cheek, I walked away and said to her, "You really don't need anything else to drink; maybe you should get your friend to take you home." She glared at me... glared at me in a way that your girlfriend / wife / mother glares at you when you have really screwed up and there is very little chance of redemption in the immediate future. That image burned into my retinas and in not all that many hours in the future, I was going to get an even better look at it. Ahh yes, frat boys really are all about being classy!
Matt and me headed outside to the “concert” and rejoined the staggette party. Things were pretty rowdy on the dance floor and Signal Hill was wailing on the KISS tunes. (For those of you who don’t know, Signal Hill is an acoustic band, but it was KISS weekend in Halifax and they did a pretty good job). Everyone was high-fiving and ‘Letting it Roll’ and suddenly the skies opened up and a thundering rain storm pelted down on all of us.
Now, it has been my experience that when it starts to rain, most people head for cover. Obviously that was not going to work here because everybody was having way too much fun… particularly the 4 Guys and it seems that somehow we became the centre of the party in front of the stage. It was like a rock video! Girls jumping around in their wet t-shirt flinging their wet hair all over the place… guys striping down to the waist screaming at the top of their lungs… everyone signing everyone else’s body with sharpie markers.
Half-an-hour later, the band ended and so did the rain… almost like it was planned… and everyone started to go home. The guys hung out with the Staggette ladies until their limo showed up. We all got invited to the wedding the next day but we had to pass seeing how we had an appointment with the “Greatest Band in The World”.
The cool breeze in the night air started to get a bit chilly through the water-soaked t-shirts as we headed back to the hotel. Jason was the only one who actually made I to the hotel at that time though. Todd hooked up with a couple of buddies from home who were there to see KISS also, and me and Matt hit Pizza Corner where we witnessed a guy too stupid to know he was being hit on by a pair of girls who were looking for a night of excitement for three.
And this only brings us half way through the trip and the concert hasn’t even started yet.
From Achmed and Me… Live Life!
Matt and me headed outside to the “concert” and rejoined the staggette party. Things were pretty rowdy on the dance floor and Signal Hill was wailing on the KISS tunes. (For those of you who don’t know, Signal Hill is an acoustic band, but it was KISS weekend in Halifax and they did a pretty good job). Everyone was high-fiving and ‘Letting it Roll’ and suddenly the skies opened up and a thundering rain storm pelted down on all of us.
Now, it has been my experience that when it starts to rain, most people head for cover. Obviously that was not going to work here because everybody was having way too much fun… particularly the 4 Guys and it seems that somehow we became the centre of the party in front of the stage. It was like a rock video! Girls jumping around in their wet t-shirt flinging their wet hair all over the place… guys striping down to the waist screaming at the top of their lungs… everyone signing everyone else’s body with sharpie markers.
Half-an-hour later, the band ended and so did the rain… almost like it was planned… and everyone started to go home. The guys hung out with the Staggette ladies until their limo showed up. We all got invited to the wedding the next day but we had to pass seeing how we had an appointment with the “Greatest Band in The World”.
The cool breeze in the night air started to get a bit chilly through the water-soaked t-shirts as we headed back to the hotel. Jason was the only one who actually made I to the hotel at that time though. Todd hooked up with a couple of buddies from home who were there to see KISS also, and me and Matt hit Pizza Corner where we witnessed a guy too stupid to know he was being hit on by a pair of girls who were looking for a night of excitement for three.
And this only brings us half way through the trip and the concert hasn’t even started yet.
From Achmed and Me… Live Life!
No comments:
Post a Comment