Achmed Back on The Rock

So, finally I am back here for a brief update on what happened to me last week. Apparently my confidence level in my healing abilities far outweighed the reality of my situation.

I had every desire to keep the blog updates going as I recovered from the nuclear blast, it seems however that my desire to sleep coupled with the biggest headache I have ever even heard of, were at complete odds with my good intentions. Actually, that may be slightly inaccurate... it would be better put to say that my intended desires were over-ruled by my sleep desires!

To make a long, and somewhat foggy, story short, I am starting to feel better today after four days of what I can only describe as the worst possible hangover that you could all collectively imagine. I have been kicked in the crotch and doubled over in so much pain that I almost threw-up and I would choose that again over having four screws drilled into my head while I was awake!

As it turned out, and I already knew this and have NO IDEA how I could have possibly forgotten, I have a tolerance to local atheistic. I found this out the hard way when I was in my early 20s and had to get my wisdom teeth out... I suppose it is possible that the wisdom of this particular knowledge was removed along with the four perfectly healthy, and severely impacted, teeth at the back of my mouth. When the dentist started digging my teeth out, I screamed and almost hit the roof. I can only compare it to some kind of medieval mouth-torture. In the past I have occasionally wondered if the dentist was just too cheap to use enough novocaine and that was the actual problem that day in the chair. After feeling the sensation of knives digging into my skull, I am absolutely sure that I have a resistance to deadening needles and I am now absolutely positive, and in no uncertain terms will I ever forget, this fact about my own personal biology if I ever need any local atheistic again! The recovery may take a little longer, but it beats feeling sharp things dig into you.

Wednesday was painful and uncomfortable, Thursday I fell in and out of consciousness all day and Friday I flew home, in what was one of the worst cross-county travel experiences I have ever had. Saturday and Sunday I mostly slept on and of all day and today I hauled my wounded ass out of the rack at close to lunchtime.

My headaches are improving and I am sleeping for longer, less interrupted periods each day. The swelling from the four incisions is going down and today, for the first time since Wednesday, I have been able to open my eyes completely for extended periods.

Over the next few days I will get the details of the surgery and the trip home here for anyone interested. All I can say about my trip home is... I flew Air Canada! Anyone who does a bit of travel can probably guess a fair bit of my story on that subject.

I cannot express enough gratitude to the surgical team in Winnipeg and to all of you who have kept me on top of your thoughts and prayers over the last while. By all accounts from the doctors, Achmed has been completely blasted and there is no reason for me not to have a full recovery and go on to lead a normal and productive life. I won’t get confirmation of that for 12 months, but I feel positive about it and I am going to be living as if all was normal as soon as my head is no longer feeling like it is in a vice, without the aid of little orange pills.

From Achmed and Me... Live Life!